I Will Miss You, Ceramics Class

I keep getting weird pains in my left hand and wrist. Thank goodness today was the last day of throwing for ceramics until...who knows when. It's also a sad day, because it was the last day I threw something for ceramics. It was a freaking awesome looking curvy bottle thing. I think it's one of my favorite pieces.

YouTube is doing maintenance so I can't upload my video that is already three days late going up. I'll have to do it in the morning, because once I'm done writing this, I'm off to bed. I have to go to work in the morning, then probably skip French, once again, so that I can get my contact sheet developed for my last (horrible and crappy) shoot, so that I can turn it in before 5pm. Actually, before 4, because I have to be at my other work at 4. Then I have to go trim my last two pots tomorrow night. I feel like I'm going to be pressed for time tomorrow all thanks to the contact sheet. I always seem to have problems developing a good one.

At FHE (Family Home Evening) tonight we made rice krispy sculptures. It was messy, but fun.

OH OH OH. I almost forgot. I finished my college application essay for The University of ------- today in Spoon Me. It was a great feeling. I'm going to have my grandpa read it tomorrow and let me know what he thinks (12th grade English teacher for +30 years).

This week is going to be pretty busy, but I would like to go to the temple at some point. I've never been to the St. George temple, only the Los Angeles one, and I haven't been to that for 3 years. Maybe Thursday...

Good night and later days.


Song of the Day: "Dancing With Myself" by Billy Idol.
Film of the Day: The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus (2009). I do realize this hasn't come out yet, but I'm quite excited for it. It comes out on Christmas, limited release.

Pink Carnation In a Pick-up Truck

In Tyler's - or should I say Elder Wedemeyer's - last, and only, letter to me, he said one thing in particular that stuck in my head. Which is weird considering his letter was literally a very small paragraph, mainly telling me that he didn't have any free time at the MTC to write to me. Right.
Anyway, he said "I think you should go on a mission!" and went on to say that it is the "most powerful spiritual experience of a lifetime".

I didn't really give it much thought at the time. But I have that nagging 'what if" feeling inside me lately. What if I'm supposed to go on a mission? At the same time, I almost can't see myself doing it. Almost.

I have time to think and pray on it though. When Tyler gets back from his, maybe I'll be going on mine. Who knows...

In other news, I had a great day at Church today. When I got home after it I remembered that I still had to do my photo shoot...with barely 30 minutes of light left in the day. It was stressful, but I got through most of it. I need to finish in the morning, along with develop two rolls sometime before noon tomorrow. I'm not yet sure how that will work out, but I know everything will work out for the best.

So about that college application essay...I'm still not done. I've been putting it off. I know, I know. It's due in 15 days, but I just don't know how to end the essay with a bang. Or at least end it well enough so that it measures up to the rest of the paper, because it is a well written paper, I wont lie. It's just intimidating.

18 days of school left! I can't wait to go to Ventura for Christmas. I miss it so much. And I'll get to see Jacquelynn! We haven't seen each other for a year and a half. That is absolutely insane. We just keep missing each other when we're in northern Utah or California.

That reminds me, I haven't been to SLC/Provo/Ogden for a while either. I haven't seen Bre, Shannon or Lindsey for about 6 months. Goodness gracious. I need to make plans to go up there. Maybe...New Years?? Perhaps.

I haven't written any songs for a few days...I should get on that. I'm trying to have 10 by the beginning of 2010 (wooowwwwwm reallly?? Time is flying by like crazy!) so that I can record as soon as I get some adequate recording equipment.

I still need a new job.

Okay, I'm done. Later days.

Song of the day: "American Pie" by Don McLean. I know every word of this eight and a half minute song. Such a great contribution to music.
Film of the Day: Angels and Demons (2009). I'm watching it right now as I type this. It's really interesting. I've been meaning to read it since I was 14, but it never ended up happening. I figured the movie would be pretty close though, considering Da Vinci Code was very similar to the novel. Which I have read.

Short and Sweet

Utah lost to BYU by 3. It was an absolute heart breaker of a loss. Good game though.
In other news, I made a video today but wont be able to upload it until tomorrow because I'm too lazy to finish editing it right now.

I made my brother watch Mean Girls with me tonight. Well, he actually did it rather willingly. He's a good sport. Anyway, he loved it, as should everyone upon the earth. Amen.


Okay, well...I don't really have a lot for today.
So later days.

Song of the Day: "The Hand Song" by Nickel Creek
Film of the Day: Mean Girls (2004)

God's Good Ocean Gone Wrong

I'm writing down vlog ideas.

It's going...slowly.

I had a good Thanksgiving. Good food, good people, etc.

I'm thankful for everything. Can I say that? I hope so. Anyway, I just did. I am literally thankful for all that I have been given in my life. Everything: the blessings, the trials, the successes, the mistakes, the good people, the not-so-good people...everything. I don't generally hear people say that, so I thought I'd start a new trend. Perhaps it will catch on eventually.

It's kind of annoying that I didn't have any money today in order to go shopping on Black Friday. Oh welllll. I got a lot of stuff done. Mainly ceramics stuff.

OH. Side note off of that:

I trimmed 10 pieces today, and I trimmed them well (as usual; I'm a huge perfectionist when it comes to art). When I was done trimming I took the pieces into the back room to set on the shelf in order to be bisked.

And then I knocked my three favorites onto the ground by brushing into them with my pants.

I HATE BEING SO FREAKING CLUMSY. It's a curse, I swear.

So because I broke my favorite things, I was a bit upset, but I tried getting over it because, I mean, come on, it happens; I can't get emotionally attached to my work when it involves pots. But it still freaking sucked. After this incident, I tried to throw some more cups that were just as awesome as the ones I broke, but it didn't end up happening. I literally threw for two hours with only three crappy excuses for cups to show for it.

It was a bad day for ceramics.

I have a new subscriber on my channel. It's Kenny :)

I never really got to know him super well, but we used to talk on AIM all the time. He's a cool guy, I hope I can get to know him better at some point.

I really need a job. Ughh. Maybe I'll give pizza factory a go. That would be an amazing job. Except that I'd get paid badly besides my tips. Utah wage laws are completely ridiculous.

Manchester United had a good game today, just in case you were wondering. I quite enjoyed watching it.

Utah vs. BYU game is tomorrow! GOOOO UTES!

Later days.

Song of the Day: anything by Beastie Boys. I personally love "Sure Shot" and "Pass the Mic".
Film of the Day: Fantastic Mr. Fox (2009). It's out!! Go see it!!! I still need to as well, but what ever. Anyway, Wes Anderson is a genius. Amen.

My Words Intimidate Me

My application essay is literally scaring me. Not like, what I've written, but the idea of finishing, of tackling those last 50 words in the conclusion so that they sound just right. I keep putting it off.

I wrote another song today. It's about the trail of spiders that Ron and Harry follow in The Chamber of Secrets. It's a bit slower than I'm used to, and just...simple. Easy. I have realized that just because something is easy to do does not mean it can't be awesome too. Right? Right. I really can't wait to start recording my songs. I'm looking forward to it a lot.
On a similar note, I told Jenna I listen to wizard rock, and she thinks I am kind of crazy now. Maybe it was the shock of telling her something out of the norm, but over the phone she sounded a little weirded out. She'll come around though; I'll help her see how awesome wrock can be :)
I also told her that Nerdfighters changed my life. That may have been a lot to take in, I admit it.


Thanksgiving is...well, it's today, actually, now that it's past midnight.
My step-dad's brother and parents came to St. George to celebrate and eat delicious food with us. I'm personally stoked about the sweet potatoes and cranberry sauce.

I was a bit distraught when I went into Harmon's today to buy more California Chips. They were out. I couldn't believe it. And they told me they don't normally sell that brand unless they are having a special, like they just were. Bummer, er whattt??
Though the man that helped me used to live in Santa Barbara, so I felt a little better about the whole thing. It's always nice to meet someone from the Ventura, Ca. area. Like the random old tow truck guy that was from Ventura; he towed my Ghetto Honda, Calvin, to his death, unfortunately. In the middle of a snow storm...those were the days.


I still haven't even started my photo shoot that's due next week. I have to shoot and develop before Monday afternoon. GAHH.
I'm not taking photography again next semester, regardless of which school I end up attending.


I'm going to take a page from the 5AG book and say why today is awesome: I have my first subscriber on my YouTube channel. Granted, I have no idea who they are because their page is blank, I still feel happy about the situation. And apparently my aunt Nicole saw some of my vlogs as well? Mmk. Cool.

Today I did a Gaga Check (this is where I push all the presets on my radio to see if a Lady Gaga song is playing on any of them. There usually is. Alex came up with the idea, I just carried on the tradition) and it reminded me of Alex and how I've been meaning to call him but haven't. I kind of sort of feel bad. But at the same time, I take so much comfort in the fact that I know he's okay and alive and all that now, that I just forget about calling him and actually reconnecting with him vocally. I should get on that; I've been a bad best friend :/

And now, I need to catch up on House MD.
Later days.

Song of the Day: "Paparazzi" by Lady Gaga. I thought this was appropriate.
Film of the Day: Ghost of Girlfriends Past (2009). Quite funny, let's be honest here.

All I Want For Christmas

I made up a Christmas list for my mom because she asked me to do so.
I put on it the worldly things I would like for Christmas. She said it was "a little out there". Well, I was straight forward; I said what I wanted, not what was completely reasonable. This is the one time every year where I can let the world know what I truly want for Christmas, instead of leaving it all up to the gift givers. If I do that I end up getting scarves and calenders and other little things I don't need. But what ever.

Today was...hmm. What was it? I don't even remember, so it must not have been great.
Oh no, wait. It was, just kidding.
I slept in way too late, like every day. I decided to go to DI (Deseret Industries, an awesome thrift store). I went in looking for a good ol' tacky Christmas sweater, but they didn't have any. So I browsed the rest of the store, not really looking for anything in particular, and I came across the movies, which generally contain workout videos and Mormon Church movies.
But I spotted a gem among the yoga tapes and Joy To the World dvds: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the original. Like the ghetto/awesome one from the early nineties with the random/crazy teenage runaway back story. And it was only three dollars. So, naturally, I bought it without a second thought on the matter.
Best decision ever (well, not really, but you know what I mean).

I then went over to the movie theatre across the street from DI and saw New Moon. It was aight.
I enjoyed it for the most part, and I think it's because of the director, honestly. Catherine Hardwicke can direct a mean drama (Thirteen), but not the best fiction movie. I'm a little bummed that Eclipse is once again going to have a different director; I was happy with Chris Weitz. But I can't have everything, can I?
By the way...Edward? His character just kind of pissed me off. I do still like Robert Pattinson though. Just not as Edward. And Kristen Stewart was okay. I still think her best movies are the ones that have nothing to do with Twilight. Like Panic Room, for instance.

I wrote a song a couple hours ago about Christmas. I'm hoping to play it for my family when we all get together for the holidays next month. It's a completely satirical song, about how presents are the most important part of Christmas. I like it. I tried to play it for my mom, but she wasn't feeling very well, so I don't think she really cared at that moment. Maybe I'll make a video playing it, get some feedback from others.
I'm almost done with my application essay to...oh wait. Still not telling where. I'll have submitted the application by the first of December though, so ya'll will know by then.
I need to get up early for the doctor in several hours, so I'd better get to sleep.

Later days.

Song of the Day: "Brand New Day" by Ryan Star, the theme music for the show Lie To Me, which is one of my personal favorite shows, thanks to Tim Roth (remember, you can listen to all of my songs of the day by clicking that link over there on the right).
Film(s) of the Day: New Moon (2009) and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990). Goodness, that movie is as old as I am.

Neither Cold Nor Hot

I'm always writing and posting my blogs at the wee hours of the night/morning. It could be worse.
It could be raining.

Wow, that joke brings me way back. Back to the insensitive drum line boys and the days when drum line was actually good. Not that I really care about Buena HS drum line anymore, but I do hold it in a special compartment of my heart. Those times were truly some of the best times, despite the immaturity.

Anyway, my weekend has been extremely...uneventful. I made some pots at school on Saturday, and Sunday I slept until noon and went to Church from 1-4. I hadn't been to Church for quite a while. I thoroughly enjoyed myself. A lot of the guys kind of keep to themselves, but the girls are all pretty awesome. And tomorrow night we're going to be playing Fugitive for FHE!!! I'm stoked on this event. Fugitive is like the Utah version of Rambo. Well, actually, it could be played tons of other places too, I really don't have any idea. I just know that in Ventura we call it Rambo.
Basically, there are groups of people in the dark with flashlights trying to get from one point to another point before the other groups, whilst hitting various obstacles on the way. I think that's it. That's what Rambo was.
It doesn't sound like the safest thing in the world, but it sure is a blast.

After getting home from Church, I treated myself to an english muffin with peanut butter and nutella with sliced banana to top it off. AMAZING.

Other than that, I've been painting a lot and watching HP and the Goblet of Fire. I'm working my way through the movie series because I realized I haven't watched half of them for quite a while, besides the third one with Jenna up in Ojai this summer. Even that was a while ago.

I got a facebook wall post from Alex Frantela the other day. Also known as my best friend in the world. I haven't talked to him since July because he's been doing Marines stuff, and I'd been sooooo worried about him, but I'm glad he's well. It was really bothering me. I'm going to call him tomorrow.

Speaking of calls, my dear cousin Jenna hasn't called me back after several threatening (not really) messages I've left on her voicemail in the past two weeks. I know she's been partying for her 21st birthday, but come on. In the words of Seth Meyer and Amy Pohler: Really?? Really? Really.

Gahh I need to catch up on SNL. It's horrible that I even missed it in the first place, Saturday nights are like a religious holiday for me because of that show.

I must dash off at this time; I have to write a one paragraph response to Super Size Me (REALLY?). It's almost not worth it, but at the same time...easy points. Plus, I've seen that film like seven times, I didn't even need to watch it to do the assignment.

Later Days.

PS - I wrote another song. I'm on a roll. Hopefully I can get a full album written by new years so I can record some stuff right away.

Song of the Day: "Home" by Depeche Mode (though not my favorite Depeche song, which is "I Want You Now", among others).
Film of the Day: There Will Be Blood (2007). Such an amazing film. Daniel Day Lewis won a second Academy Award for this movie (and I personally think he should have won another for Gangs of New York in 2003, even against Adrian Brody, though his performance in The Pianist was also quite brilliant), not to mention a fantastic performance by Paul Dano.

Tolerance For Obscurity

I love life. Just want to throw that out there.
Today was so close to perfect, it's incredible.
I woke up, got to class on time (thank goodness I only have one class on Fridays), and bought another bag of clay. Then I went home for a bit, ate a muffin that wasn't as good as I'd hoped it to be, and went to the art building to throw some cups.
And that I did.
Two cups, three mugs, though I haven't put the handles on yet. That's a job for Monday.

I'm also sorry to say that I will not be continuing on with NaNoWriMo.
I know, I know...quitter.
Except not. I don't generally quit, I just can see myself getting more frustrated than is healthy for me by trying to finish 50,000 words in the next ten days. It's the end of the semester and I have a lot to do.
Like bring up my French grade because of that horrible test from yesterday. Also, I have a lot of pottery to make before December, because my last day to trim anything is the third. I also have to shoot a roll of action shots before the weekend is up and develop and make prints and gahhhh. Photography is super time consuming.

Last, but nowhere near least, I have to finish my application essay before December 1st, my personal deadline, even though the application isn't due until the 15th.
I'm also kind of freaking out about my job. Or lack of working at it. I've worked two hours in the last two weeks. I need a better job.
It's such a bummer too, because I absolutely love the job that I have now, working with kids and teaching them to cook. Amazing.
But I can't not make money. Which is exactly what's happening.

And now...I'm going to go try and finish that essay.
Later days.

Song of the Day: "Baby, You Wouldn't Last One Minute On the Creek (Acoustic)" by Chiodos
Film of the Day: Pleasantville (1998)

A Good Day

There are several legitimate reasons of why I find today to be so fantastic.

One. I finally figured out who sings that "Soul Sister" song, though I'm extremely surprised that I didn't know already. It's Train, by the way.

Two. Whilst finishing my self serve frozen yogurt at Krave, the owner threw me and my brother each a free Krave t-shirt because we go there so much. I'm actually not completely sure if this is a good thing, but I dig the shirt. And then I thought it was funny when my mom was irritated that she didn't get one.

Three. I sold my electric guitar. This, also, is borderline on the fantastic scale. Seeing as it was my first electric guitar, it was tough to let go. But on the upside I made some money.

Four. I learned how to play "The Chain" by Ingrid Michaelson on my acoustic guitar. Though it is true, the song is supposed to be played on piano, as it is on the album, but it sounds pretty down on the guitar, too.

Finally, today was great because I just felt happy all day long.

I was able to get out of bed before 11 am this morning. Barely. considering that my usual wake up call is never 11 am, I see this as great improvement.

I proceeded to get ready for the day, and by that I mean putting on my Weber State sweats, an old field hockey sweatshirt, and my dirty mustard yellow Vans. By the way, I really want some new Vans, but I literally am forcing myself to not buy anything so that I can save up for some recording and mixing stuff so that I can tackle an album next year. [Dream big.]

I went over to Spoon Me, my favorite studying spot in this entire town, and studied for my French test and consumed a delicious smoothie. I then took my French test an hour later, and I'm almost certain that I got at least...a D on it. It was an absolutely horrific experience; I'd rather not talk about it.

I would like to mention that, when leaving Spoon Me, I drove past the theatre, and there were already lines for New Moon. As in the New Moon that starts in two hours. There were lines for it at noon.

Goooooooo UTAH.

I'm more stoked on the fact that HP7 part one is coming out in a year than I am for New Moon to come out at midnight in two hours.

I'm tired.

I'm going to go finish Seven (yeah, I still haven't finished it) and then go to bed.

Later Days.

PS -

Update on the mystery college application essay:

I still need to finish it. I'm almost done, I just have to tie up a few loose ends, let my grandpa read it (he taught 12th grade English for 30 something years), and maybe revise it a little. Then I will submit it.

Once I do so, I'll let know know where I actually applied to :)

Song of the day: "Boys With Girlfriends" by Meiko

Film of the Day: Fight Club (1999), seeing as it came out 10 years ago. We should all go watch/re-live its ultimate magnificence. In Tyler We Trust.

I just realized I am watching Seven, which also stars Brad Pitt, and is also directed by David Fincher, one of my favorite directors.

Paper Problems

I just had the best conversation on Omegle.


Stranger: ARE YOU WALDO
You: i wish.
Stranger: i must keep searching
You: let me know when you find him though, yeah?
Stranger: hell yes


The end. It made my day perfect.

Other than that, I found five Nerdfighters last night and one this afternoon on that thing. I generally ask if they go to Hogwarts, if they are looking for Margo too, or just simply say "dftba".

My day was alright besides all that. I was in bed until about 2pm because I woke up with a horrible migraine that wouldn't leave me alone. Once I was up and had taken a shower, I actually wrote a song about how much headaches suck. It was a good time.
I then proceeded to return a forgotten DVD to a redbox at Maverick's, and ended up developing prints in the darkroom upstairs at the art building. I'm glad it was open even though we didn't have school today (I still don't know why we didn't have school today; everyone else besides the college had school). I have three 5x7 prints due tomorrow that I needed to get done. Regardless, I ran out of paper after only having two of the three, one of them being too gray for my liking, but the other came out perfectly.
At least I have something to turn in.
I also have to shoot a roll of action shots within the next week. Not sure what my plan is for those pictures yet...

After cleaning up at school, I came home, ate some amazing burrito things that my mom made for dinner, and edited my vlog that I made yesterday/today. It was supposed to go up yesterday, but yeah. You can just watch it. My brothers think it's hilarious, but let me know.


I found someone to buy my electric guitar for 50 bucks. I'm doing it. I need money. I'll miss my guitar though, it was my first electric :[ I've had it for six years.
I'll live.



As I mentioned in my previous post, I bought Seven the other day. I started it but never finished. I keep turning it on every night and pausing it, then I get distracted doing something else and...one thing leads to another. Anyway, I still haven't finished it, and I would really like to, because I haven't seen it since my sophomore year of high school. I totally remember the day I watched it too.
Jenna (my cousin/best friend ever) and I borrowed it from our uncle Brandon on VHS because both my art teacher/local cage fighter and her photo teacher said it was a great movie. We told Tyler to leave because we knew it was rated R and didn't know what we were getting into.
Anyway, it was intense. Definitely not as intense as the first time I saw, say, Requiem For a Dream (which is one of those movies that you really only need to see every five years or so because, let's be honest: it was a freaking amazing film, but I don't know if I could survive the intensity and overwhelming emotion caused by it), but it was still crazy insane. And [SPOILER] [SPOILER] [SPOILER] Kevin Spacey makes an fantastic serial killer.

I'll end there. Later Days.

Song of the Day: "Sweet Disposition" by The Temper Trap. Apparently it's on the 500 Days of Summer soundtrack, which I've yet to see, unfortunately.
Film of the Day: American Beauty (1999) starring Kevin Spacey and Annette Bening. He won an Academy Award for it, she was nominated but totally should have won...except that Hilary Swank won for Boys Don't Cry (also a very intense/great film), who, now that I see that, definitely deserved it more. I wrote too soon. It also won best picture, best director, best cinematography, and best writing; five total.





I just realized I wrote the words "crazy insane" towards the end there. I laughed when I saw that I thought of what my 12th grade English teacher, Captain, would have said about it. Yes, we called her Captain.

Dear Elder

I usually blog on wordpress, but I figured I could give this a chance. We'll see how it goes.

I'm just going to copy my last blog from http://kesharab.wordpress.com/ for my first post on this blog.

I got a letter back from Tyler the other day. It was about a paragraph long telling me that he was having a blast, but that he was busy and he’d write again soon when he had more time. I don’t even know why it took a paragraph to write that, most of it was just fluff; filler words.Regardless, it was nice to hear from him.

I didn’t get my essay for my application done quite yet. I actually completely forgot about my Saturday deadline I’d set for myself, was going to finish it today, but I’ve had the weirdest head ache going on since I woke up this…afternoon. Yeah. I know. Anyway, I woke up with a semi-migraine, got it down to a good, ol’ fashion head ache, but now it’s worked its way back up to where it started at. Not the best day.

Yesterday on the other hand was good. I spent most of the day in the art building at Dixie glazing pots and developing prints in the darkroom. While I was glazing, I got complemented on my trimming skills. Definite self-esteem booster, especially since it came from someone who’s won nationals with his pottery. I glazed 4 cups and a bowl, but I still have 2 cups somewhere on the “already bisked” shelf that I couldn’t find anywhere. And I have 4 more cups that I’ll be trimming tomorrow and glazing at some point this week. I have about two and a half more weeks to make 4 more cups with handles, and then I’m done with all of my required assignments.I spent more time in the darkroom up stairs. A couple of hours. I made a really crappy contact sheet for my portrait shoot roll, and spent most of my time making wallet sized prints of Tyler that I took of him the day before he left for his mission to Honduras, so as to give them to the family as Christmas gifts, along with the million and a half pots that I have to give away. While looking through the negatives, I really only found this one picture that I absolutely love. He’s such a great person to take pictures of. I miss him.

Song of the day: “Whisper” by A Fine Frenzy

Film of the Day: Seven (1995). I bought it at Target today for 5 bucks. “Good freaking deal”, I thought.